SENSITIVITY TRAINING

 

Here's how it went down: I was sitting

near the bar with Big Gus when the

jukebox started playing "Plaisir D'Amour"

which was Big Gus's favorite as all the

regulars knew as they knew that Big Gus

required complete silence till the song

ended. So the room got very quiet-

except for one table where three guys

continued to carry on a conversation.

Big Gus got up, walked over to their

table and sad, "Excuse me, Gentlemen,

but I'm listening to that song and your

conversation is distracting me." The

biggest guy looked up at Big Gus and

said, "You're kidding, right?" And Big

Gus said quietly, "No sir, I'm not

kidding," at which point the guy snickered

and turned his back on Gus (a mistake)

and proceeded to continue the conversation.

Big Gus looked over at me, shrugged

apologetically then picked the guy up

and threw him through the front window.

The second one he downed with the chair

that the first one had been sitting on

and the third escaped through the hole

made by the first guy with the assistance of Gus's

size fourteen boot-whereupon big Gus

reseated himself across from me to

resume his listening undisturbed. No

one was even breathing. As the last

strains died, Big Gus looked over at

me and sighed. "I guess I'll never get

used to it," he said. "It's really

hard being so sensitive."

 

 

Albert Huffstickler