Paul announces, "The mullet is lesbian haircut number two!" Everyone is baffled by this comment, until Billy (Andrinor) explains that there are only five. Then everyone is satisfied. Bruce (Longfellow Yost) explains to Paul that KFC actually buys their cole slaw in fifty-five gallon drums and uses a gravity-feed system to dispense it. Chuck (Marcus Sangaree) shudders and comments that it's really best that he didn't get his lunch at KFC. Chris (Tonk Sangaree) and Tim (Anpago Yost) just trade stories about Starship Troopers 2, Buffy, and how David Bowie has been a traveling magician for the last twenty-five years.
Chuck brings jerky. Mmmmm... jerky...
Tonk Sangaree lectures Andrinor very sternly, "If you want to scrape ooze-boy up and take him off to the Temple, and if you want to spend the next two weeks in quarantine until the rest of us are satisfied that you're not displaying any ooze tendencies, then be my guest." Andrinor relents and admits that his interest in interrogating the deceased Ooze Master is not as strong as his interest in not being locked into a closet by the rest of the group.
In contrast, interest in interrogating Tomas Silverleaf's spirit remains very high. The characters develop a plan to take Tomas Silverleaf's body off to the Temple of Pelor and have the priests there play Twenty Questions with him. Longfellow Yost fetches down Watches-Birds-at-Dawn to carry the body. The other characters assume that this will actually enable them to take a body through the city without any comment: the locals have already gotten used to seeing a bear tromping through the city with an eagle riding on its shoulder. Adding a body in to the picture really doesn't change the situation much.
On the way back up to Highthrone, Anpago Yost and Tonk Sangaree discuss the household problems of living with so many strange animals, some of whom do not understand the use of the water cabinet.
The priests still remember that the characters saved their High Priestess' bacon two months ago, and are more than willing to give them a casting of Speak to Dead for only 120 gold (20% off). Unfortunately, most of the characters are currently broke. Oddly enough, the eagle has the cash. Tonk watches Longfellow fish gold coins out of his bear's saddlebags one at a time with great curiosity. He comments, "I'd always thought that that bear's primary use was as your wallet. How long did it take you to learn to grab a coin with one claw like that? Woops, I guess you haven't figured it out completely. Want me to help you up off the ground?"
The priest solemnly accepts the characters' money and then tells them that they have two questions. He warns them that the answers are likely to be brief and possibly cryptic. The priest casts the spell. Tomas' corpse sits up in a terrible mockery of life and speaks.
Longfellow forks over another 100 gold for enough Gentle Repose spells to keep Tomas' body fresh for another week, until he is available for another Speak With Dead spell. Darg Sangaree stomps his hooves and asks, "If Gentle Repose works on severed body parts, will it also preserve meat?" Tonk replies, "There's something very wrong about casting Gentle Repose on your lunch. Unless you belong to some kind of cannibal cult."
The characters decide to go see Teldaros Dostavar and ask him about Lord Rosh. They reason that his late father was nominally knowledgeable about the subject, and might have passed some of that wisdom on to his son. They stop by the Dostavar residence in the city and are told by the gate guards that Lord Dostavar is very busy. A rather more helpful functionary tells them that Lord Dostavar will be able to meet with them in three days' time. They make an appointment.
With some time to kill, Longfellow heads off into the forest to perform rituals on Watches-Birds-at-Dawn for two days. The bear ends up 2 hit dice larger, and all for the low cost of 400 experience points.
Anpago Yost heads off to sniff some paint thinner. He comes back 2 INT stupider.
The other characters sit around the fireplace and listen to Marcus Sangaree describe terrible stories of civil war and ork invasions. In the process he confirms many of the vague stories of orc attacks the other characters have already heard in the marketplace. He also tells them that Duke Morris has proclaimed himself King of the South and is a leader among the nobles of the Secession.
Tonk asks Marcus, "So, what is our family doing? Are they war profiteering just the way we'd want them to do?" Andrinor comments, "I heard they were selling smallpox-laden blankets to improve their sales of healing herbs." Marcus claims that the family is making money, but not by doing anything underhanded. The other characters wink and nod knowingly, understanding that the cousin originally sent to spearhead the trade effort with Highthrone was more than happy to participate in slave mongering, gambling and drug addiction.
Over the next two days the temperature in Highthrone starts to drop very noticeably. Nobody really knows why: it isn't yet summer, but winter has passed and the temperature should be rising. But instead, it is really quite chilly. Tonk indicates that if it gets any colder the characters are going to have to do a tauntaun on Watches-Birds and sleep inside him. Andrinor proposes plucking Longfellow instead. Longfellow objects to both of these plans.
The characters make their meeting with Teldaros Dostavar. They are shown into a sumptuous den. A brisk fire burns in the fireplace to keep out the chill. There are comfy chairs for the characters to sit in, though Longfellow is cautioned to watch the claws. Lord Dostavar asks, "So, what do you want?"
Tonk leads off, "Sir, you are doubtless familiar with Lord Rosh. For a while, he had a lieutenant named Tomas Silverleaf. He came to town three or four days ago to kill us. He had some success in this, in that he killed our cousin Darg. We reincarnated him as a centaur, and now he's become a messenger for the family. In any case, we have his body and have been asking him questions through Speak To Dead." The characters explain to Lord Dostavar what they have learned about Lord Rosh from Silverleaf's spirit.
Lord Dostavar asks the obvious question: "Why did you come to me with this information?" Tonk explains, "Well, your family has a seat on the City Council and might be able to perform a more complete interrogation on the corpse. The information could be valuable to the city, and we would like to know it as well. Is this something you or the Council would be interested in? I have a seat on the Board of Regents at the Arcane College, and might be able to get a break on the cost for you. Also, time is of the essence as we are intending to take our family to southern Davra due to the current conflict."
Dostavar indicates that he is interested, if the characters are willing to leave the body. They make arrangements to communicate either using Darg as a courier, or using the Arcane College's magicians' Whisper spells, or through Darg's and Longfellow's Animal Messenger spells. Lord Dostavar reminds the characters that Speak With Dead is a divine spell, and really represents the best way to get information from the corpse. As a result the interrogation process will take some time.
The characters also tell Lord Dostavar about the hidden goblin city off in the jungles and Lord Rosh's fortified home there. They also mention the orc massacre that Lord Rosh engineered there. The clear conclusion is that if the leadership of one of the orc factions failed to walk away from that incident, it would have gone a long way towards ending the civil war among the orc tribes and forging them into a real threat to the human lands in the North. Lord Dostavar points out that he has always been interested in peaceful resolutions to conflict, but then asks for an accurate enough map to the goblin city to allow it to be bombed by skyship. Tonk suggests that both Longfellow and Anpago flew over it, and should be able to draw good maps. The characters agree to head to the Wingless Condor and talk to the proprietress, who has a large supply of accurate maps. They intend to get a map of the area and mark the location of the forbidden city upon it for Lord Dostavar.
The Wingless Condor is owned by Hannel and Denna Cusar. They are retired adventurers. Only moments after the characters step inside, a very excited servant bursts into the room. He announces, "The docks are being attacked! The skyships are on fire!" The characters rush to the docks to kill things.
As it turns out, both the Dostavar household and the Wingless Condor are quite close by to the docks. There are eight docks, all made of stone. Each is forty feet wide and three hundred feet long. They protrude from the mountain, and are supported by massive pillars. Netting is strung between them to catch anyone who falls. The dock surface is dotted with huge winches.
The skyship crews are either fighting or running. The characters can see that the ships are under attack from fire elementals. Most of the ships are locked into their harnesses and cannot fly away. There are also fifteen-foot giants with great axes and giant wolves stalking up and down the docks, killing any who fight back. The giants are white-haired and look gaunt. Their wolves are big and covered in frost; Andrinor deduces that they are winter wolves.
The characters move to the nearest dock. They can see four giants and four winter wolves facing off against four rather hapless-looking locals. Seven fire elementals are scattered around; they seem to be preoccupied with setting a pair of skyships on fire.
Tonk moves in first, pulling a black bear from his Bag of Tricks and throwing it at a nearby winter wolf. Tonk is just a little bit concerned to see the wolf take the bear apart with its frozen breath and sharp teeth. Marcus Sangaree hurls a Spiritual Weapon at the nearest fire elemental, mildly annoying it. Longfellow tosses a Flaming Sphere at a nearby winter wolf. Andrinor and Anpago decide to show the others how it's supposed to be done and set up a barrage of Lightning Bolts and Fireballs against the giants and wolves.
The characters are quite amazed to see a human wearing the brassard of a skyship Captain step forward as his crew die and slay two fire elementals in two mighty strokes. Anpago crows out, "Good show! Survive this and we'll buy you a brand new cabin boy!" The Captain goes on to slaughter one winter wolf and seriously injure another one without showing any sign that he heard Anpago's comment. Marcus muses, "Hmm... Perhaps pixies are both invisible and inaudible to the Captain. I wonder how I could get something like that worked up for myself..."
Two giants move forward. One of them savages Andrinor. He moans, "Ohhh... I have only ten hit points left..." The other swings at Tonk, but misses. Tonk finds himself pressed by both the giant and its pet winter wolf. He is clearly disoriented by his situation: he gets hit twice by an axe-blade the size of his torso, then pig-piled by two winter wolves. He is so off balance that his attacks miss rather miserably. Marcus Sangaree points out, "Hey Tonk! You realize that you're in a perfect position to do a whirlwind attack!" Tonk finds that he is far too busy bleeding to respond in kind.
Marcus Sangaree pulls out his composite short bow and lands two shafts into the giant facing Andrinor. Watches-Birds rushes in to attack the giant attacking Andrinor as Longfellow flies in and casts a quick Cure Moderate Wounds on him, taking him back almost to full health. Andrinor reels in confusion, but demonstrates that he is not so confused as to not be able to cast Burning Hands against a giant. He notices with some pride that the creature is starting to look like it is poor condition.
Anpago starts playing fast and loose with the Fireballs and fries one of the two giants Tonk and Watches-Birds are in melee with. The other one gets covered with a thin layer of ash but suffers no other visible ill effects.
Then Longfellow brings out the elephant. The elephant almost kills a winter wolf. Watches-Birds almost kills the giant it's facing. Longfellow comments, "Does someone have a Magic Missile available?" In response, Andrinor very helpfully whirls about his Cloak of the Mountebank, steps halfway across the battlefield, and zaps one giant and one winter wolf with a Lightning Bolt. Anpago comments, "Hey, that Captain seems to be a really badass fighter. I bet he's got lots of magical swag. Maybe I should just accidentally Fireball him along with the wolves..."
At this point, the ground underneath the characters' feet starts to shake. The entire dock moves, and not in the good Las Vegas way. Anpago ignores the shaking in favor of hitting the wounded giant with two Magic Missiles. Down goes the giant.
A fresh giant steps into the fray and chops off approximately half of an elephant. Another giant hits the Captain, who is now looking rather shaky. In response, the Captain explodes into a Boots of Speed-driven killing frenzy, wipes out the winter wolf and leaves the giant clutching for his intestines. The Captain comments, "That giant did not know who he was fuckin' with."
Tonk executes a whirlwind attack on the two winter wolves that are harrying him. He cuts down one of them. The surviving wolf wounds Tonk again.
Marcus lands a couple of arrows in the fresh giant (#3 on the scorecard, for those playing at home). He crows out, "Call me Legolas!"
Andrinor hits a giant (#4 on the scorecard, but we like to think of him as "Grumpy") with a volley of Magic Missiles, reducing it to 1 hit point. In exasperation, Andrinor throws a knife at the giant and kills it. With a one-point hit. The giant staggers and falls.
And then the dock starts to fall. The end of the dock collapses first, taking the ship, four fire elementals, the Captain and Andrinor with it. Andrinor rather miraculously avoids getting hit by any large chunks of rubble, but finds himself about fifty feet down standing on a pile of rubble. He notices that the Captain looks like he's in even worse shape. And to top it off he sees that there is a forty-foot long worm with huge rock-crushing mandibles eating away the remains of the support pillar. He recognizes the thing as a frost worm, one of the most feared creatures of the Northern tundra. Frost worms are physical creatures, but are also infused with the powers of the elemental plane of Cold. They also have a terrible sonic power that can paralyze their victims. And when they die, they create a huge explosion that is enough to kill practically anything. Tonk comments, "I bet the referee who created this thing really hated his players."
Andrinor comments, "Well, at least we know why the temperature was dropping around here." Tonk, "Yeah. So much for the fucking famed Ranger Patrol. They're too busy electing one of their members as the Queen of the Ice Fair to notice huge fifty-foot worms crawling up to the city." Anpago replies, "I vote for Rob!" Tonk grumbles, "Well, maybe we'll be able to learn what a ranger looks like after he's been through a worm's digestive tract."
Andrinor leads off against the frost worm with two Fireballs. The creature actually manages to dodge the fireballs, leaving the characters stunned speechless. Tonk gasps, "It's a fifty-foot worm! It must be the most agile fifty-foot worm ever!" The worm moves to attack Andrinor, who screams, "It's been nice knowing all of you! Not the face! Not the face!" Andrinor vanishes into the worm's gullet. Marcus opines, "Worms are abominations, aren't they?" Tonk, "This one is. You know, I'm starting to think that Highthrone is a real shithole of a place." And then the worm starts to trill. Marcus is paralyzed. Anpago is paralyzed and invisible. Anpago's frog familiar Lop-Lop is also paralyzed.
And then a woman shows up apparently from nowhere and sings. To everyone's surprise, her song cancels out the trilling effect. Andrinor (from inside the worm's mouth) sings out, "We love bards! We love bards!" Anpago leaps back into the air and casts Charm Monster on the worm. The worm throws off the spell.
The Captain drinks down a potion, yells, "My life in service! Don't cry for me, because I'm already dead!" and hurls himself at the frost worm. Longfellow watches out of the corner of his eye to see his Flaming Spheres take out the last giant, then dives to cast Cure Moderate Wounds on Andrinor, bringing him back into operation.
And then the frost worm breathes on Longfellow, Andrinor and the Captain. Andrinor goes down to -38 hits. There isn't enough left of him to put into an ice tray. Longfellow is just at -5, and is in pretty bad shape. The Captain turns into a frozen statue and shatters into a zillion pieces.
The female bard holds out a potion to Tonk. He grabs it and drinks it down. "Goody! Opium!" It lifts him a couple of inches off the ground and makes him feel invincible. In the background, he sees Professor Vermmond Haggus running up. He drinks a quickie Cure Serious Wounds potion and flies over the edge of the shattered dock. The worm notices and takes a bite out of him. Tonk flutters back upwards rather weakly.
Anpago casts Haste on himself and swiftly flies down to pick up Longfellow's body. He leaves Andrinor behind. He drops the dying eagle at the bard's feet. She throws a huge healing spell on Longfellow, bringing him back to life.
Tonk thinks about landing on the frost worm's back until he realizes that some of the damage he just took was a side effect of the creature being just so darn cold. He grabs altitude and goes for the healing potions.
Marcus looks over the edge and muses, "Hmm... Time for the good arrows." He opens fire on the creature with his magic arrows.
Professor Haggus yells, "Get out of here! I'm going to hit it with a Fireball!" Longfellow takes his menagerie outta there. Anpago drags Tonk away. Professor Haggus kills the creature with his Fireball. Then it explodes with a 100-foot radius cold blast. This is enough to catch Marcus, the bard and Professor Haggus. They are partially shielded, so they are affected only by the cold damage, and not by the piercing damage. Strangely, this does not cause nearly as much joy amongst them as one might have thought. Only the bard is still standing afterwards. But the rest of the dock collapses: the blast was enough to destroy the next support.
Longfellow flies in with his wand of Cure Light Wounds and brings Professor Haggus and Marcus Sangaree back to functionality. The chaos and noise is dying down, giving them a chance to look around. Two other docks have been totally destroyed, and most of them look like they are in serious need of repair.
Highthrone's overall military capacity has been seriously hurt by the destruction at the docks, the loss of ships and the death of one of the city's most notable military commanders. The bard introduces herself to the characters as Denna Cusar, the map lady. Tonk thanks her for her help, then accepts a Reduced giant axe from Anpago and starts chopping away at the ice to collect Andrinor's body. And the Captain's body. He asks the others, "Anyone have a cookie tin?" Anpago exerts tremendous restraint and doesn't loot the Captain's body.
Denna Cusar indicates that her healing talents are going to be needed around here, so she agrees to meet with the characters tomorrow. At this point, the fighting is mostly over. The characters sit around on the remains of the docks and recuperate. They learn that three fiery gates opened up on the docks and the creatures just poured out of them. As soon as the attackers arrived, they split up and hit separate docks as if they had a dedicated plan. Everyone agrees that this sounds bad, but Tonk speaks for everyone when he says that his new information partially absolves the Highthrone ranger patrol. Anpago learns that some folk saw the other side of the gates briefly. It was dark, and smoky, and had a red glow, and a sulfurous smell. This sounds like either hell or the Dragon Kingdoms to most of the characters. Nobody knows where the worms came from, but there might have been more gates underneath the docks.
Some heralds emerge from safety and make announcements. Marcus grumbles, "All able-bodied males are conscripted into the military." Actually, it turns out that there's now a 6000 gold reward for the one known as the Flame King. Nobody has heard of the guy.
Longfellow Reincarnates Andrinor. He comes back as a pixie. Anpago tells him, "Hey, being a pixie is where it's at!"
The characters head directly for the Arcane Academy's library. They have only just arrived when a messenger shows up and says he has a message for Tonk. Tonk calls out, "I take it!" Longfellow whispers to Anpago, "Have you noticed that he falls for that same poisoned note trick over and over?" Longfellow is surprised to see that Tonk doesn't turn green and fall over. It turns out that the notice just says, "I have information on the Flame King. Come to the Missing Page."
The Missing Page is a strange little bookshop buried in the depths of Highthrone. The place looks like a Half-Price Books. An old man named Partos Kinkara ("Master Poe" for short) runs the place. He admits that he did send for the characters. He tells the characters that what he's going to tell them is secret, and that some of these secrets are protected by the law of the town. So they must never tell anyone. And if they are forced to tell, they must never say where they heard them. Everyone nods solemnly, except for Anpago who nods like a hummingbird on crack.
Master Poe continues, "When the people who founded Highthrone came to this valley, they believed that it was blessed by Pelor the sun god, which is why it was warm. But Alazar Tael found that the temperature was good because Highthrone rests in the caldera of an active volcano. Alazar set up spells to keep the volcano stable hundreds of years ago. His descendant Hubert Tael belongs to the same secret society of mages as his ancestor. He was obsessed with fire spells and got the nickname 'Flame King' from his friends in the society. I do not know where Hubert is now, but I believe he has found a way to tamper with the magic his ancestor set up hundreds of years ago. He could doom this town to a frozen death."
Longfellow muses, "Alternately, he could doom the town to a very quick, very hot death."
Tonk asks, "Why does he hate this place so much?"
Master Poe replies, "He was always a very obsessed person. He cares nothing for the town or its people. He cares only for gathering magical power and allies. He has made many deals with elemental lords that may not have been wise." Hubert lives in a mansion on the plateau known as Highthrone Parke. Unfortunately, he has managed to accumulate some power over the years, and has arranged to escape the negative consequences of his actions. He can easily hide himself from divinations, so nobody knows where he might be.
The characters head over to Highthrone Parke with a cart. They claim to be posing as movers. Or carny folk. They can't agree which. The place is full of aristocrats' second mansions. The Tael place shows no signs of movement. Marcus heads to the gate and checks it for traps. Then unlocks it. The characters open it up and trundle their cart in. They park the cart so it isn't visible from the road. Then they send in the pixies, who find nothing living in the house or the grounds. Anpago tries searching for occupants with Detect Thoughts and finds nothing. They find a few furnishings, but most things (including the library and the bedrooms) have been completely cleared out. Anpago moves to the front door and verifies that there is a spell on it with Detect Magic. He stands back and Knocks it. When the flames and the explosions end, the only casualty is the door. Anpago tells the others, "We're okay! Looks clear!"
The other characters enter and search the place. Anpago suggests putting up a Permanent Illusion of a wounded priest of Kord on the doorstep. Andrinor explains, "You're trying to allay suspicion. Why don't you just put up an illusion of the door still being there?" Tonk tells Andrinor, "You get the cleverness award for today." Anpago says nothing as he casts the illusion.
The house turns out to contain one very interesting thing: a summoning room with a silver inlaid circle of protection. Andrinor checks to see if anything is inside with a stick. Anpago reminds him, "You realize that if you break the circle whatever was in there goes free."
Tonk uses rope to look for hidden chambers. He finds nothing.
Then Marcus exerts his detective-like skills to find a surface that someone was writing on. He is able to lift off a rubbing of a map of two pillars at some location outside the city, off on the mountainside.
Longfellow finds a bottle of good wine. He trades it to Marcus for the map showing where the villains are.
The characters return to the city. The next morning, it is barely 45 degrees in the sun. Longfellow shivers.
Each character gains 3886 experience points. Longfellow blows 400 of them boosting up Watches-Birds (as noted above).